Why are goodbyes always so sad?
And so it is. My last day at work. I still recall four years ago, the feeling of apprehension when I met everyone at work.
“Am I able to do all this?”
“Everyone is so brilliant at what they do, and I’m merely a junior, inexperience engineer.”
“What if nobody likes to work with me?”
All sorts of unnecessary worries had clouded my mind. Tough as it was, four years later I realize it wasn’t so bad after all. This being my first career experience … I’m glad it had turned out well for me.
Tears rolled naturally down my cheeks during my farewell session at work. I felt so embarrassed … but I knew deep down, it was real. I could not believe how accustomed I have grown to this life. Being an important part of someone else’s life, is always a gift. Who would have taught I had folks who worried about me driving to work on a snowy morning; cared about my well-being, provided fatherly advice on my love life and finance management … These are wonderful souls who have touched my heart in ways I will never forget.
I felt so confused with emotions today each time I walked past Steve’s office, as if I wasn’t sure when would be the last time I would barge into his office to annoy him with questions. I must admit, we did not get along well initially. In fact, I was quite intimidated by this man. He was very forthcoming and aggressive with what he wanted. At the time, I had just transitioned into the role of a contact engineer … still trying to rationalize the system and the people while thinking to myself … “What does this man really want??? He’s not helping at all!!”
But we soon realized there was a disconnect, and talked to each other honestly about it. And that’s when the bond between us grew stronger each day. I am fortunate to have worked under the mentorship of an intelligent person like him. It feels weird to say this sometimes, but being physically far away from home, he is the closest fatherly figure I had to depend on. I see a lot of my dad in him. It was difficult to part, and even though we gave each other two warm hugs, my natural instinct brought me back to his office to give him one last hug. I do and will miss him very much.
Memories … are such powerful influences to the mind. If there is one thing that I wish I could hold onto until my last breath, it would be my memories.
I’ve shed the tears. I’ve said my goodbyes. And the memories have been etched in mind and heart. May they always remind me of the warmth and love of the people I’ve met here at work.