I am considering moving out at the end of my lease. I am ready to retire from the sharing-rent bonanza. What an experience it has been all these years, but I quit. This roommate business has got to end sometime.
When you are living with someone, no matter if it is your super-nice boyfriend, angelic best friend, or a close relative … you will be the first to know their true colours. We meet many people in our lives, who either become our friends or enemies. As the saying goes, never judge a book by its cover, I believe the same applies to nice people that you meet along the way.
Again, no one is perfect. I accept that. But of course, I choose to accept what I can tolerate too.
Friends and acquaintances have commented that my roommate is such a nice girl. When I first met her, that was what I thought too. Time definitely tested our relationship as roommates. And today, it has reached a point where I’ve minimized my conversations with her to just casual greetings. I don’t know if she is aware of the situation.
It was just the two of us at first. Then, our unemployed and poor boyfriends came into the picture. Her boyfriend, J.A., moved from Ontario to Red Deer, Alberta, with hopes of looking for a decent engineering job. My bee, J.C., got laid off in Calgary, and just moved in to live with me for the time being.
From two to four. The place is now crowded. We have more personal items to store and use. We have a third room that we decided to use for storage as well as a guest room. I found a twin bed frame for free, and placed it in the room.
J.A. and my roommate are quite inconsiderate. I own one big cooking pot. I use it more often because I now cook for two instead of one. There was no formal rule set at the start, and so we just used anyone’s utensils, dishes, pots, etc.. If these people were mature enough, they would have observed that I only have one big pot. So, when you are done cooking with that pot and have leftovers in it, store it in a freaking container and put it in the fridge! Each time I need to use it, it has not been emptied and cleaned. The worst part is, J.A. actually brought his big pot and some dishes from Ontario here, and so why is he storing it in the third room? As memorable keepsakes from Ontario? WTF? I think they got the hint now after a few requests to clean the pot for my use, and I brought his items out for viewing. Apparently, he “forgot” he had it.
Speaking of the third room. We decided to use it as storage and a guest room. Storage means items that you don’t access on a daily basis (i.e. vacuum cleaner, ironing board, luggages, christmas tree, snowboard equipment, etc.). You get the idea. Therefore, having J.A.’s daily clothes and accessible personal items in there has taken up additional space. It was also very messy. His stuff was everywhere and not organized. I was annoyed, but I did not want to tell him how he should be living his life in this house. The fucking best part is that the reason he puts his stuff in the third room is because my roommate does not allow it in her own room. Perhaps, there’s no space in her own room, you might say. One day, I went into her room to her bathroom to look for my cleaning detergent, and what did I find? Nicely clean and neat room. But with fucking lots of space for J.A. to put his personal items!!!! Even though, he did buy a drawer to organize his clothes in the third room, what the fuck is that kind of attitude? What kind of inconsiderate bitch is that?
Whatever. Their relationship and how they run it is none of my business. But when it gets in my way of living, she’s going to be just another bitch to me.
I bought organizing racks to get our items organized so that my sister and her boyfriend could sleep comfortably in the third room. All she said was thank you. That’s fine with me at first. Until one fine day, she commented about our “items in the hallway”.
I was away for the weekend. Apparently, she had cleaned up the place, when her brothers were staying that weekend. I came back home to a spanking clean place, which was nice. And I realized she had move J.C.’s cooler boxes that was in the hallway into the third room. Fine with me. I was totally cool with it, until she decided to discuss it:
“I need to talk to both of you. You’ve probably noticed that I moved your items into the third room. I’ve realized that there are items in the hallway and against the wall and I would appreciate it if you could move them away from the walls into the third room so that we can have more living area space. It’s been going on for 2 months now and I didn’t know how to tell you because I didn’t want to be rude.”
This part of the discussion was fine. Here comes the ridiculous part that just pissed me off:
“Even my brothers said that this place has ‘changed’ since the last time they were here. I know I am a neat freak that way so if you need me and J.A. to move stuff around to accomodate let us know.”
Do I fucking care about what your brothers think about this place? You just cleaned up this place, because of your brothers critique, and they probably advised you how to confront this matter with me. You know what, if you have a problem with my neatness, I’m fine with that. Bringing your brothers into the picture just tells me that you are not tactful at all with your approach. And you probably will never be because of your ‘kiasu’ personality.
Fine. The next weekend, I had to re-organize the third room storage space because I was packing up the christmas tree and ornaments. She and J.A. were away that weekend. What we found was ridiculous. Lots of empty boxes that could be thrown away or flattened up. Why is she keeping the box of drinking glasses that she bought? Emotional attachment? Even if you do move places, you don’t need to pack these things back into its original box. So she has a problem with my neatness, I have a problem with her ridiculous storage items. The truth is, it is taking up alot of valuable storage space that we can use for more useful items. And so, I placed her empty boxes outside the room against the wall so that I can ask her if she still needs these boxes. I had no intention of throwing them away, not until I clarify with her.
She came back late night Sunday. I was in the room going to bed. She saw the boxes most likely, got pissed off, and started slamming the light switches and her room door. What kind of fucking attitude is that? Next morning, I did not mention anything yet because I felt that we should just go to work and then discuss it when we both get home from work. When we’re both physically there to discuss the boxes. Perhaps, I should have mentioned something in the morning. Either way, she asked me what I wanted her to do with the boxes while we carpooled to work. I told her the situation, and there she starts displaying her defensive mode and giving all these excuses why she need those boxes. At that point, I just kept quiet and figured I should just wait until we get home and sort it out.
Got home. First thing I did was to ask her which boxes she wanted to keep. Then, I told her I would place them on the bed frame now, and told her straight in the face that the bed frame area should not be used as a storage space. For now, light items can be placed there. When guests come, these items have to be moved somewhere else. That was a hint I gave that it will have to be moved outside into the hallway if there is no space.
I have stopped carpooling with her. I figured I will be happier this way by minimizing conversation with her. The problem is that she pretends. She wants to be the know-it-all. She thinks she is right most of the time. What’s a perfect example? Her relationship and thundering arguments with J.A.. I’ve encountered many situations with her that way too, such as the police check methods for the P.R. application.
A recent example was from yesterday. Since we don’t carpool anymore, she found a ride with someone else. She exits and enters through the main door because it is my turn to use the garage this week. I came home after work yesterday and found that the main door was not dead bolted. Only the knob twisted to the lock position. If she claims to be the mighty neat freak, I am the safety freak. What do I care at this point? I told her what I saw, and asked if she had dead bolted the door when she left for work. She said yes. Okay, and so I asked her if she heard about the recent robberies in town. For the safety of our belongings, I think we should have the door both dead bolted and the knob locked. Then, she tells me that it was difficult to dead bolt the door this morning because of the cold weather. Fair enough, I know there’s troubles with the door, but it is doable. Excuses, excuses.
Then, I told J.C. what happened. And J.C. said that the door was not dead bolted when he woke up after we left for work in the morning. What a bitchy liar! Fucking liar! I detest liars!!!
She’s a spoiled kid. Her father adores her. Rich family too. There’s something about Thai people, whereby they are very proud of their identity.
At least, she is not a thief or a “destruc-to”. Personally, on the surface she is a really nice person. On the inside, I think it is a little tainted. I pity J.A. for being her bf. Everything has to be her way or he takes the highway. She makes him wake up early in the morning to have breakfast with her before she goes to work. She makes him wake up early on a Saturday after a late night work at the cafe just to play squash. Got into a huge fight because they were late.
Besides, mature adults don’t purposely showcase their arguments in public or in front of acquaintances. She doesn’t fucking care. Well, that is very inconsiderate of her because I don’t want to feel awkward, or force myself into the room because she is arguing with J.A. in the kitchen. It’s my home too, and I don’t need to put up with your relationship issues. Bring it elsewhere or back inside your room, bitch. What a childish bitch.